Lessons in Confidence From “Judge Judy”

“Beauty fades. Dumb is forever.” — Judge Judy

I’ve always had a bit of a love-hate relationship with the daytime program, Judge Judy. When I was a kid, my father tuned in to watch it every day, four p.m. on the dot. It was, for me, a terrifying experience to watch her rip apart every poor soul who dared step foot in her courtroom. She was (and is) the embodiment of every angry parent and suspicious school administrator I’ve ever encountered.

Unlike other courtroom TV shows like The People’s Court or Judge Mathis, Judge Judy doesn’t hire actors to re-enact cases. As the passionate male narrator exclaims in the intro, Judge Judy is all about “real people” with “real cases”.

Of course, she isn’t technically working in a legal courtroom. The individuals who agree to be on the show are actually going through arbitration — a legal method used to resolve conflicts outside of the court. Judge Judy’s decisions, however, are still binding because both the plaintiff and the defendant sign a contract beforehand that prevents them from renegotiating the ruling afterward. Being an arbitrator allows Judge Judy to operate without as many regulations of a legal courtroom.

If you have, by some chance, never managed to see an episode of this long-running show, I’ll give you a run-down of how each case typically goes:

• The plaintiff and defendant enter the courtroom as the male voice-over narrates what the case is about. It’s usually one of these three scenarios: the defendant borrowed money from the plaintiff and hasn’t paid it back, the defendant’s dog attacked the plaintiff’s, they got into a car accident and the defendant won’t pay up.
• Judge Judy narrows her predatory gaze onto the plaintiff (sometimes the defendant) and begins to grill them with questions at the speed of light. If they try to provide her with anything more than a simple answer, she cuts them off. From the start, Judge Judy makes it clear she’s not interested in sob stories or long-winded explanations.
• The plaintiff or the defendant (or both) will usually fail to pass Judge Judy’s questioning. When someone’s story doesn’t add up, Judge Judy is quick to point it out, and she’ll continue her interrogation until all the holes in a story have been found…